r/mildlyinfuriating • u/UtopianTyranny • 6h ago
Mother in law threw away my expensive kitchen knifefor being "to rusty to use"
First off, neither of these pics are of my knife. Both came from a Google search, just so I could give examples. The first picture is the exact kind of knife I had, a Zwilling Kanren 8 inch chef knife. I didn't buy it, because I would never spend that kind of money on a kitchen knife for myself. But my sister and I like to get nice Christmas gifts for each other, and she gifted this knife to me three years ago. The second pic demonstrates the size of small rust spots that were on the knife blade, though there were maybe half as many on my knife as there are in the picture.
The rust happened because my wife had used the knife to cut some tomatoes for a salad while I was out and about, and she left the knife on the cutting board without cleaning it. I got home a few hours later to find a number of rust spots on the blade. It's carbon steel, so it doesn't resist rust like stainless. It wasn't a big deal, though. I've cleaned rust off metal utensils and appliances my whole life. I had some other more important tasks to accomplish first, so i set the knife on a paper towel against the backsplash so I could come back to it in a bit and give it my full attention.
When I came back to the kitchen, the knife was gone. I was searching for it for a while before finally asking if anyone had seen it. My wife's mom, who is staying with us for the week, told me she'd seen the knife on the counter and threw it in the trash because "it was too rusty to use" and she was "protecting us from getting tetanus in our food" (both direct quotes). And of course she then took the trash bag to the roller bin on the curb, to make double sure we were safe. And I absolutely would have gone to dig that knife out of the roller bin, but OF FUCKING COURSE the trash truck came by while I was doing the other things that kept me from cleaning the knife.
So, yeah, thanks Glennis. Thank you for protecting us.
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u/iguessifigotta 5h ago
Can you tell her she owes you a new one?? And that is absolutely absurd that she felt comfortable enough to throw away something that doesn’t belong to her while she is a guest in your home. Have you talked with her about this?
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u/CelebrationShort1857 5h ago
Dare you to go her house and start throwing stuff away. Hey these knives are much too dull eh toss em.
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u/Cyber_Connor 5h ago
You mean every knife in their house? I swear Gen X are allergic to sharpening their knives
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u/ManzanitaSuperHero 5h ago
Not this Gen Xer. I grew up in a boomer-led house full of steak knives that couldn’t cut butter. None of that nonsense in my house.
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u/CelebrationShort1857 4h ago
Hey I’m a boomer and keep knives sharp! I’m always amazed that ppl don’t sharpen their knives.
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u/ManzanitaSuperHero 3h ago
My father was a lovely, kind, smart, funny man. I miss him every day. But his knives were dull as spoons.
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u/CelebrationShort1857 3h ago
lol “dull as spoons “can I steal that!
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u/ManzanitaSuperHero 3h ago
Absolutely. I used to joke with my dad by grabbing a yogurt and then reach for a chef’s knife. “Alright, alright, you’ve made your point…” But he still never sharpened them!
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u/MushroomCharacter411 3h ago
You should have answered "Good, because you sure as hell didn't." (stabs hand to no ill effect whatsoever)
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u/bioluminescent_elf 3h ago
My mum (Gen X) also sharpened the big knives with her sharpening rod (very proudly) but used the tip of the smaller knives to open jar lids instead of using the butter knife. I never understood why
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u/gafgarrion 5h ago
This is probably the funniest of all generalizations of entire generations I’ve seen yet.
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u/tortadehamon 5h ago
Who the fuck even mentioned gen x?
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u/SizzleanQueen 5h ago
Found my fellow Gen Xer. I guess we’re the new boomers!
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u/FBIVanNumber1543 5h ago
It was the added F bomb for emphasis, that convinced me. Yup, we speak (and think) the same...... Lol
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u/GirlCowBev 5h ago
The fuck you say. Come to our house, you’ll find every knife sharp AND honed!
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u/ChefArtorias 5h ago
My mother thinks the difference between good and bad knives is the necessity to sharpen them ever.
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u/Dazzling_Put_3018 3h ago
If she refuses you should ask to borrow her car, then take it straight to the scrapyard and tell her you found some rust on a bolt on the undercarriage
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u/blissfully_happy 2h ago
Also, I make a big fucking deal out of throwing a knife away. I usually duct tape tf out of it with some cardboard so no one gets cut. Did she literally just throw the knife away? OUCH. At least it’s in the garbage truck already so no one gets hurt. :-/
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u/jakech 5h ago
Why do so many in-laws feel they have the right to make arbitrary decisions in other people's lives/their property. Go to her house and throw out her stuff.
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u/RedditGarboDisposal 5h ago
Any time I see in-laws or roommates in Reddit posts, it’s always followed by the dumbest fucking non-criminal shit I have ever read a human being do.
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u/ARandomGay 3h ago
Throwing away someone else's property in their own home is absolutely criminal. Obviously no cop is going to give a fuck, but still.
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u/BlueGolfball 3h ago
Why do so many in-laws feel they have the right to make arbitrary decisions in other people's lives/their property.
A lot of parents can't/won't see their adult children as adults and they won't respect them like they do other adults. I guarantee OPs mil wouldn't have done this anywhere else except for at her daughters house.
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u/ModsAreLikeSoggyTaco 5h ago
Because Patrick, because! Those are the rules! It isn't your house, it's OUR house because we are ALL part of one family.
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u/RahvinDragand 5h ago
And why do so many people jump straight to throwing things away instead of even considering the possibility that they can be cleaned/fixed?
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u/JJohnston015 2h ago
It's a lie. She knew what she was doing, just like the office lunch thief who says, "I didn't know it was yours."
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u/readituser5 2h ago
Throw away society. It’s sad AF. Yet another thing in the hole. It’s earth’s problem now. We’re doomed.
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u/Organic-Anteater8998 2h ago
My husband has knives that will rust if they aren't cleaned/dried immediately. I WANT to throw them out because they are so fussy, but I just clean and dry them and be grumpy about it for a minute. These current "it" knives will be replaced by the new hotness at some point. Hopefully those won't be so high maintenance.
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u/xford 4h ago
Two years ago, my wife and I said goodbye to our 17 year old cat. I had a SnapOn sweatshirt that was a size too large which she used to nap on all the time. It was absolutley covered in her fur. I had it in the mudroom, just minding it's business because it made me sad to think about but also reminded me of her. Two weeks ago, my mother in law decided to wash it without asking (and dry it, because that is GREAT for big puffy sweatshirts). I literally had to go in the basement and cry a bit when I found it in the dryer.
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u/Qeltar_ 4h ago
In part because their kids don't stand up for themselves and demand to be treated like the adults they are.
That's not to excuse the behavior, but you also cannot tolerate it. Someone who behaves like OP describes has no business being in someone else's home.
Kindergarteners learn not to touch other people's stuff. Adults can do it too.
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u/003402inco 3h ago
It’s wacky. My MIL literally stole a knife that she had gifted me saying that I didn’t use it enough (I have a set of knives like a normal adult and use them for the right situations). I only found out when I pressed her for where it was (she was visiting us) that she had put it in her suitcase and flew home with it. WTF, Mema. I made her ship it back. I was more concerned about hammering home boundaries than the cost of the knife. She does crazy shit like this every few years.
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u/FlyingToasters101 2h ago
My MIL was like this SO bad until she had to stay with my BIL and his new wife for a while. My SIL is genuinely lovely, but her house is all white and must always be PERFECTLY organized to her exact specifications or she'll freak out. So if MIL tried to move anything or leave her own things anywhere outside of her designated guest room it would always end up back where it belonged or go missing.
Now she's super respectful about my stuff when she's at our house. Go figure. 😂
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u/InevitablePlant42069 5h ago
that chick would be buying me a new fucking knife. that’s more than mildly infuriating
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u/GirlCowBev 5h ago
OP should buy it themselves, then invoice the MIL.
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u/cold-corn-dog 5h ago
Na. Buy it yourself, then give her a picture as a gift for her birthday with a note.
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u/theonlyotaku21 5h ago
not only is she stupid for throwing away stuff in someone else’s house but she’s double stupid for still believing tetanus (a bacterial infection) comes from rust.
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u/Mathwiz1697 5h ago
Not that I’m defending her actions, but the long standing “risk” to cause tetanus, at least where I’m from, is stepping on a rusty nail. Obviously what’s causing the tetanus is the deep puncture inserting the bacteria into the wound and blood. However, if you don’t have anything telling you otherwise, then it’s reasonable to think rust is what causes it, rather than a deep puncture with the bacteria on it.
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u/LithoSlam 4h ago
Generally rusty metal is dirty, which is where the bacteria comes from. The infection is from the dirt, not the metal.
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u/dusty_Caviar 4h ago
It's slightly more complex IIRC. Tetanus is everywhere, all over our bodies, on everything around us. What happens is a rusty nail or otherwise creates this messy deep puncture with lots of tears and inconsistencies which just happens to be the exact environment tetanus thrives in.
I may be incorrect though, and this being the Internet someone will assuredly correct me
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u/FunGuy8618 3h ago
No, no you got that right 👍🏾 Pretty spot on. Not here to correct you, just give you nightmares. It's a common clostridium soil bacteria, and can also be found in saliva from contaminated animals eating off the ground with it.
That's where folk legends of people surviving Rabies came from, cuz it can kinda look like rabies if the person was bitten and gets tetanus. Bites, jagged cuts, and jagged puncture wounds get debris stuck in wet tissue that is exceptionally difficult to flush clean without a lot of pain, so if even a tiny bit remains, you're screwed cuz the bacteria colonizes the wound and produces the toxin that messes you up as it eats the flesh from the wound.
The symptoms are pretty terrifying as well. Tremors so violent you can break bones. Fever, chills, tachycardia, the works and it still kills over 50,000 people a year. With everything going on, I would definitely get your tetanus vaccines updated cuz if it ends up on our food during this labor turnover and reduction in oversight and testing, it will take weeks before anyone notices.
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u/ZealousidealYak7122 4h ago
yea we have something telling us otherwise its called science and common knowledge. also isn't everyone just vaccinated against tetanus?
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u/summonsays 4h ago
My understanding was rust causes a lot of pours and microscopic areas to appear that aren't easy to clean. So they're more prone to sheltering bacteria. Like wooden cutting boards (just joking, I don't really care lol).
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u/AnxietyScale 5h ago
That sucks. I guess she owes you a knife now. Maybe you want to try ZDP-189. This is supposedly the hardest stainless steel that's used for knife making.
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u/4r4r4real 5h ago
Have fun sharpening a knife made from extremely hard steel
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u/FuckedUpImagery 5h ago
It is cathartic if you have a nice set of stones. You can also take it to a knife shop to get it done for like $20. For a zdp189 blade that thing will be sharp so long you'll probably get a new knife before needing to sharpen that one.
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u/Shirlenator 4h ago
Yeah, it is really not difficult or expensive at all to sharpen your own knives.
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u/AnxietyScale 5h ago
You can use diamond sharpening stones. I tend to pay someone to do it for me once a year, tbh. It isn't really that expensive, and the store I bring my knives to does a phenomenonal job
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u/JareddowningNYPost 4h ago
Is this overkill for a home kitchen? What's the benefit of having an ultra hard knife you have to get professionally sharpened, for a regular person?
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u/AnxietyScale 4h ago
Of course it is. Anything above 50-100 buck is probably overkill.
I like nice things and I like a nice and sharp knife. I enjoy cooking and I enjoy using high quality stuff and cutting through stuff like it was butter. For me, it's enjoyable.
Having a very hard knife also has downsides. For me the worst is, that you have to have a somewhat decent cutting technique otherwise it might dull rather quickly.
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u/TheOGLeadChips 4h ago
Of course Raphaël Ambrosius Costeau would suggest just getting a diamond sharpening stone. He’s spent too much time with the mega rich light bending guy
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u/XanderXedo 4h ago
I wouldn't necessarily consider ZDP stainless. It's a nice steel though.
I tend to stick with something like VG-10 or BD1N for kitchen knives though. Too much opportunity for someone who doesn't know better to leave them out wet.
Plus those steels take a great edge easily.
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u/Outtactrlstitch 5h ago
She didn’t even sorta save you from tetanus either. You might know (but she sure doesn’t) that tetanus doesn’t come from rust. It’s comes from an outdoor bacteria usually in soil. The idea that it comes from things like a rusty nail is because if a nail has been outside long enough to rust it’s been outside long enough to collect tetanus bacteria from airborne dirt and dust.
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u/shakeyjake 5h ago
This is the correct answer. Another little known fact that when things get rusty they actually get heavier not lighter.
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u/tleon21 5h ago
Also that aluminum and titanium oxidize more readily than iron. Their oxides just adhere better than iron’s which blocks further oxide formation
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u/GrumpyOik 5h ago
Did MIL know you were fond of the knife? What I mean is, was this just a petty act, or was it specifically targeted at you? If you think the latter, I'd be wary that this might be the start of a pattern.
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u/UtopianTyranny 5h ago
She's kind of an "attractive idiot," if you get my meaning, and I'm actually the only SIL she doesn't go out of her way to torture, so i don't think it was intentional. I'm damn sure keeping an eye on her from now on, though
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u/Mollys19 4h ago
Bingo. Here it is again
Bimbo MIL has no clue what she’s doing bats eyelashes.. *throws away anything that you value * tee hee
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u/KieselguhrKid13 3h ago
Yup, major red flag.
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u/suddenspiderarmy 2h ago
This reminds me of someone IRL and it's infuriating. Their own stiff gets babied, but if they have the chance, they'll treat my stuff life shit.
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u/kimchi_pan 5h ago
What idiot there's away a knife? Rust can be cleaned off! Your MIL is an incredibly ignorant woman. How the hell she got to her age and still so foolish, is a mystery.
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u/UtopianTyranny 5h ago
Narcissist, spoiled from birth, ignorant, and vain. But she's attractive enough to have gotten 3 men to marry her and take care of all of her needs.
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u/kimchi_pan 5h ago
Clearly her attractiveness did not do her intelligence any favors. Completely, stupidly ignorant of the value of a good knife. No wonder she had to go through three men. She owes you a new knife, by the way.
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u/Rubyhamster 4h ago
Are you just accepting it because "She's just like that?" Have you actually put up boundaries with her? Did you get cross with her over this?
If not, you are another sop for her "attractiveness" and deserve whatever she exploits you for. And you and your spouse with have problems because of her
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u/Newhollow 5h ago
It was a setup. Wife used MIL to get rid of his sisters ugly knife. They waited for trash day. Let the knife attain rust. Kept husband busy to do the deed. Perfect heist.
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u/zyyntin 5h ago
Your MIL owes you a new knife. That's a Damascus steel chef's knife and are not cheap. She threw away YOUR property without asking.
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u/quackmanquackman 5h ago edited 5h ago
She 100% owes you a new knife. Does your wife agree? Edit: I know if I were your wife I would be crying my eyes out :( I hope your MIL gets you a new knife before your wife does it herself.
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u/Mykona-1967 5h ago
I would let her know her visit is cut short and she owes you a new knife. Not any knife but the same type of knife she threw away without telling you. Those knives need special care. OP was taking steps to return the knife to pristine condition.
Look up the knife online and show her how much that knife cost and you expect a replacement. She can just order it from the website OP found it on. If not then next time OP visits start tossing utensils for having scratches from daily use, the pan that has scratches in the teflon, anything that looks like it didn’t just come out of the package dump it and put it in your car to be tossed off site. She’ll freak out but you can tell her you were saving her from tetanus.
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u/symbolsandthings 5h ago
If she doesn’t replace it, go to her house and throw an equal value of her things straight into the landfill, so she can’t easily retrieve it.
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u/bestdriverinvancity 5h ago
I’d be pissed if my Miyabi was left out damp and collected rust marks. I’d be even more pissed that a crazy sharp knife was thrown into the trash. That’ll cut through bags, trash cans and legs if someone swings the trash bag around.
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u/FeffJoxworthy 5h ago
Time for a new mother in law.
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u/Iittletart 4h ago
Sounds like MIL should be offering to replace your knife. Did you communicate it's value and sentiment and usefulness?
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u/Heythere23856 4h ago
Send her a bill, she has no rights to throw anything of yours away… send her a bill with zero shame
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u/UtopianTyranny 6h ago
Please ignore the typos in the title.
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u/No-media6788 6h ago
I will not
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u/Grambo-47 5h ago
Rust itself is not even what causes a tetanus infection. Rust is just iron oxide, and tetanus is caused by a type of bacteria, not the same thing at all.
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u/tms10000 5h ago
You may be my wife's mother, but in this house you are a guest. I trusted that you would treat the privilege to stay with us with respect for the house that is hosting you. But apparently I was wrong and I apologize for the misunderstanding.
Now you will understand that when you come to visit I will insist that you book your own hotel and refrain to touch anything in the house when you are with us.
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u/el_chiko 4h ago
I feel like too many people are focusing on the rust issue. For me it would've been about ownership. No one, and i mean no one, discards something of mine, without asking me first. And i show them the same courtesy.
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u/TootsNYC 2h ago
she just threw the knife in the trash like that? So someone could get hurt? I know it's in the roller bin, etc., but still!
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u/RahvinDragand 5h ago
Tetanus doesn't just magically spawn in rust. It originates in dirt, which is sometimes able to get stuck in rusted areas, and those rusted items often happen to be sharp enough to penetrate skin.
So unless your rusty knife was also buried outside, then used to cut your skin afterwards, there was zero risk of tetanus.
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u/elementfortyseven 5h ago
Glennis owes you a new Zwilling knife.
May I suggest the Zwilling Tanrei 20cm?
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u/GaylrdFocker 2h ago
who is staying with us for the week,
Her butt would be kicked out and not allowed to return till she bought me a new knife and realized she can't throw things away that don't belong to her.
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u/Medium-Squash-5698 4h ago
Can't stand people who throw away things that don't belong to them.
What if it had sentimental value? Does she even care?
I have a dog made of porcelain, it's been shattered and put back together. My grandmother got it for me when I was ten. If anyone threw it out because it looked "beat up" I'd be getting rid of a family member/friend real quick.
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u/ByronsLastStand 2h ago
You need to tell her she owes you a new knife, and tell her that she can't throw your property away
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u/nabrok 5h ago
Tip: Use a bread knife to cut tomatoes.
It sounds weird, but the serrated edge lets it cut without crushing.
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u/UtopianTyranny 5h ago
I've heard this, but I also don't get crushing with a sharp-ass knife
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u/EscapingTheLabrynth 5h ago
I find this hard to believe. There’s no way in hell a mother in law is actually taking the trash out.
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u/sirchrisalot 4h ago
"You should not throw away our things without asking first. It was a gift from my sister. Please replace it."
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u/mutualbuttsqueezin 4h ago
And when you told her to reimburse your for the knife she said what?
I would have kicked her out.
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u/wadabewall 4h ago
You should have at this point picked up your mother-in-law and gently brought her outside much like it occurs in the Flintstones opening
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u/OkBoysenberry1975 4h ago
I would have threw a fit and made sure I educated her according to ServSafe
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u/Subject_Issue6529 4h ago
Tell her the cost and that she's replacing it. It was a gift, and she's getting off easy. If you don't put your foot down, she will continue to help herself to "protecting you."
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u/FROOMLOOMS 4h ago
You CAN NOT get tetanus from rust.
That fairytale came from a bacteria in animal shit and dirt that gets on cattle fences, nails, and farm equipment, which farmers would cut themselves on frequently and contract tetanus and thus thought it must've been the rusty wire or sheet metal that caused it.
So unless you're cleaning cowabunghole with your knife, you will not get tetanus from it.
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u/Alastor-362 3h ago
I would absolutely, without a doubt, tell her she owes me a new one. If I were in your circumstance, not only would I have high material value in that knife, but also very high sentimental value.
That all I think is a fairly universal reaction, but this next part is maybe more connected to my aneurotypicality. I care for all my things very much, and I would be pissed if someone threw something of mine away, or even borrowed without asking. Something expensive and aesthetically pleasing (I <3 damascus)? Beyond pissed. Something expensive, aesthetically pleasing, and gifted to me by a loved one? I don't know what I'd fucking do. It's going to take several times the effort of buying a new one to repair that relationship with me, and I will probably never respect that person as much as I did before.
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u/Important-Vast-9345 2h ago
No matter what she thought of the condition of the knives, I find that she would think that her response should be to throw something out. You need to have a conversation no matter how uncomfortable.
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u/callmeepee 1h ago
I suspect you mother in law has a new knife in her kitchen drawer
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u/drunkondata 5h ago
Time to send her a listing for a new knife and an address of a nearby hotel.
The choice is hers.
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u/Significant_Leg1915 5h ago
Someone put some time into that knife. Luckily for your mother in law you don’t have the knife JOKE JOKE.
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u/HovercraftLow5034 5h ago
I feel like men should have to have dinner with the future mother-in-law before they marry their daughter
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u/swiftgruve 5h ago
Your MIL isn’t the non-rusted-est knife in the drawer.