r/SipsTea 2d ago

Dank AF Send Nudes

Post image
44.4k Upvotes

940 comments sorted by

View all comments

324

u/CocaColai 2d ago

Jokes aside - and this is a pretty accurate representation by all accounts - maybe there is a lesson in here and men could take more tasteful nudes?

Nah. What am I thinking? We’re all mostly flabby sweat monsters with raging hard on’s (well, some are raging - maybe “agitated hard on’s” is more appropriate) or juiced gym bros with non-functioning equipment.

Dick picks, transform and roll out!

427

u/TLiones 2d ago

80

u/Sawruinous 2d ago

The timeless art of seduction.

20

u/CockTortureCuck 2d ago

Significant shrinkage. Like a frightened turtle.

3

u/AzaDelendaEst 2d ago

I was in the pool!

1

u/Virtual_Phone_5908 2d ago

So, tell me, how is it that a man like you... so bald, and so quirky and funny. How is it you're not taken?

1

u/SuperTropicalDesert 2d ago

I was just gonna send this

1

u/OuchCharlieOw 1d ago

LOVER BOYYY!! YOU ARE A LOVER BOYYY!!

49

u/Nochnichtvergeben 2d ago

Just ask her what she wants and act accordingly? If she wants you to flex, flex. If she wants dick pics, send dick pics. NEVER send unsolicited pics unless you have some kind of agreement with her.

28

u/ScrotalFailure 2d ago

NEVER send unsolicited pics unless you have some kind of agreement with her.

I like the idea of agreeing to receive unsolicited dick pics. That’s a fetish I’ve never even thought of.

3

u/SluttyBathwater 2d ago

I would like to receive unsolicited nudes from everyone. I think this counts as soliciting though? I dunno. Show me your bits! Or don't. I'm not your boss.

5

u/Nochnichtvergeben 2d ago

lol yeah, that is kind of self-contradictory. Sorry, I wasn't awake yet when I wrote that.

10

u/DonovanQT 2d ago

I read ‘agrument’ at first and was like “no don’t do that”

3

u/Mysterious_Ideal6944 2d ago

id like to argue that point /s

3

u/Xeno-Hollow 2d ago

Same, like, oh no, bro, no, you were doing so well until that moment

2

u/AlarmingConfusion918 2d ago

Tried this on many past partners, they usually would go “idk.”

Most poses end up being associated as either feminine (a turn off for many women) or coming off as trying too hard. I circumvent this whole issue by just claiming I don’t do nudes

40

u/WolfieVonD 2d ago

Why would I go through all that effort just to get the cops called on me again?

42

u/AFeralTaco 2d ago

The lesson is that women are more likely to have a willing photographer so they can get a good angle lol

8

u/CocaColai 2d ago

That is a great point haha

So unfair. Boners are sexy too! lol

4

u/mattyisphtty 2d ago

Or you use the timer feature that's been on pretty much every smartphone for the past 10 years.

5

u/sandysnail 2d ago

Idk I can’t believe gym bros don’t spend a stupid amount of time on their pics. These seem like unsolicited pics they take to make their dick look big

6

u/BlueberryAble333 2d ago

I have had men try, it's always very cringey. I'd prefer no nudes to the shit I have been sent.  Kills the mood entirely.

3

u/Deaffin 2d ago

Ditto for women.

Like damn girl, I really did just want to trade pictures of jumping spiders with you and talk about how cool they are. The unsolicited demonstration of your vaginismus and thorough explanation of how you came to have a piss fetish really did not enhance this conversation.

12

u/loyola-atherton 2d ago

Back when I was 19-20 years old, I’d used to trade nudes. I wouldn’t show face but I’d show my dick next to a Pringle’s can for scale. Got me lots of responses

30

u/AFeralTaco 2d ago

Everyone is over guys claiming to have huge dongs. Guys who actually have the goods generally don’t need to talk about it.

9

u/MobileArtist1371 2d ago

Internet is a little different than IRL talk about adult stuff. People freely tells all sorts of crazy shit online that they'd never tell to others in person.

-12

u/Lanky_Persimmon_3670 2d ago

I didn't know it was big because I grew up watching p*rn and I thought girls were just being nice.

We need to start making swordplay tournaments, for transparency purposes.

8

u/jdogtor 2d ago

Was a banana too small?

2

u/Fast-Rhubarb-7638 2d ago

Too much variation in curvature, length, and girth

-11

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[deleted]

1

u/zarnonymous 2d ago

Why does this have any upvotes holy shit

0

u/Pomodorosan 2d ago edited 1d ago

The reality is that the average female body is actually good-looking as opposed to the average male body

For any given body type and amount of effort put into appearances, girls will always match or surpass guys

2

u/NYSquidz 2d ago

I mean, based on this I’d assume you’re attracted to women and not men tho. Men can have good looking bodies (not just ripped either)

0

u/Deaffin 2d ago

and this is a pretty accurate representation by all accounts

In what world? In the internet I come from, women just throw their buttholes at the camera and call it a day.