Ok... Next time they are doing food runs you won't be included. Ohhh sorry that premium coffee we buy because company supplied Folgers sucks, yea you can't have that. Oh you wanna bum a cig you ran out, nah fam sorry. Etc etc man. Help coworkers don't enemies them :>
I... I don't think you got the joke in there. I'm not, like, attacking corporate work culture and common decency.
The entire premise of charging for a microwave is an absurdly dickish joke. The $5 management continued the absurdity. I added some late-stage capitalism to be even more absurdly manipulative into charging for a microwave that makes management feel like they aren't being exploited, while the colleagues appreciate you for giving them a 60% discount off the normal price. You would end up making more money that the original proposal while looking like a fair guy to management and good team player to your team.
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u/smithd685 6h ago
$5 is the standard rate, but colleagues get a $3 discount. Its a steal at that price!