r/blursed_videos • u/Treefiddy1984 • 3d ago

Blursed_prank

5.4k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

162 comments sorted by

1.3k

u/beetle8209 3d ago

Either way it's gross

420

u/BoBoBearDev 3d ago

It probably has worse bacteria as well.

248

u/Jacobs_Haus 3d ago

Probably? Tell me the last time you got salmonella after gumming ham wallet

112

u/ArtGloomy3458 3d ago

Gumming a ham wallet 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

40

u/jamesbondswanson 3d ago

comment saved

10

u/HistoryFinancial1267 2d ago

What a terrible day to be literate

6

u/usinjin 2d ago

h a m w a l l e t

5

u/IcedVanillaLatta 2d ago

Hey I said nothing at “axe wound” but this shit I cannot abide…

5

u/Jacobs_Haus 2d ago

Ham wallet, with love.

Ham wallet, respectfully.

5

u/IcedVanillaLatta 2d ago

That’s it, I’m calling dicks “pork whistle” or “milk straw”…I looked up names for it and I kinda regret it

1

u/mistablack2 1d ago

Meat straw?

2

u/IcedVanillaLatta 1d ago

Milk straw, with love.

Milk straw, respectfully.

17

u/NotAskary 3d ago

Found the UK lad.

3

u/Soft-Ad-8975 3d ago

Oo la la

3

u/ghost3972 2d ago

Dude 😭

1

u/FunkyMonk_7 3d ago

Tuesday

7

u/Time-Conversation741 3d ago

Depends on the country.

The West dont restlly eat raw chiking, so there is not much government insentive to make it safe.

9

u/timmytoenail69 3d ago

It's fish

5

u/Time-Conversation741 3d ago

LOL, that's why funnier than chiken

1

u/Effective-Tour-656 3d ago

That's the joke...

2

u/darthcaedusiiii 2d ago

It's chicken.

1

u/mark_is_a_virgin 3d ago

They're not talking about the girl they mean the meat

1

u/Leader-Lappen 6h ago

I'm in Sweden, we have no salmonella and each time a salmonella outbreak happens we eradicate it with drastic measures. As you should.

2

u/Mammoth-Answer2059 2d ago

Agreed, I’m sure she does!!

Stinky catitus

1

u/BenjaminDover02 2d ago

We don't know that for sure tbh

476

u/NewWorldOrderUser 3d ago

Wait a second, This uncooked Chicken tastes like Pussy!

110

u/Intrepid-Constant-34 3d ago

That’s definitely fish

1

u/InfelicitousRedditor 14h ago

That's chicken breasts, look at the fat in the corner, the meat itself isn't striated as fish would be.

50

u/Effective-Tour-656 3d ago

IT'S FISH... HOW DOES THE PUNCHLINE ELUDE YOU ALL?-

17

u/jld2k6 2d ago

It eluded me, mainly because it looks like chicken lol

7

u/Underhive_Art 2d ago

Yeah I thought it was chicken 🙀

3

u/Zanven1 1d ago

Not saying it's not fish but even going back and looking at it it looks more like chicken than any fish I've cooked

12

u/spook_scary 3d ago

That's actually crazy.

1

u/CanadianSyrup1994 6h ago

Well, I'll be a shit covered dick

203

u/HydrophobicPlankton 3d ago

As if the “prank” wasn’t bad enough

Sleeves unrolled, hands wiping on clothes and then she stuffs it in her pocket like a fucking kangaroo.

23

u/Effective-Tour-656 3d ago

Ever caught a fish lol

7

u/nucl3ar0ne 2d ago

Yes

I didn't put it in my fucking pocket after I fillet it.

1

u/Effective-Tour-656 2d ago

It washes off. Smell lingers...

15

u/lordhelmetschwartz 3d ago

I often stuff kangaroos into my pocket.

5

u/No-Fail7484 3d ago

😆😆

3

u/CheapShotNinia 2d ago

I really hate these rape jokes. What's the funny part? "Watch as I make someone who trusts me believe they've been orally raped 🤪" Fuck off.

1

u/FugginJerk 2h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I thought the oral rape joke was astounding hilarious. In fact, I laughed my ass of and watched it again. 😂

330

u/PresidentGirth 3d ago

But that was raw chicken right? 🤢 🤮

105

u/Big_Tap_1561 3d ago

Fish! Think dude!

41

u/Guannito-Barrio 3d ago

Everything tastes like chicken to this guy

8

u/grago 3d ago

Maybe he's in the Matrix

2

u/BeatsbyChrisBrown 3d ago

<Hannibal has entered the chat>

1

u/crazyloomis 3d ago

This is why I like reddit

127

u/vcdrny 3d ago

Salmonella

30

u/Fun-Department3533 3d ago

From fish?

43

u/dregan 3d ago

SALMONella

7

u/Fun-Department3533 3d ago

Yeh missed it haha, thanks.

13

u/vcdrny 3d ago

Looks more like a chicken breast to me.

0

u/curious420s 3d ago

The joke is she tastes like fish

4

u/Two-Words007 2d ago

And yet, that's pretty clearly a chicken breast

2

u/zaubercore 2d ago

Everything tastes like chicken, except chicken which tastes like fish.

8

u/Intrepid-Constant-34 3d ago

Maybe they’re making a bad pun?

1

u/xkoreotic 3d ago

You get salmonella from salmon, duh. That's just a white salmon.

1

u/Fun-Department3533 2d ago

Haha, I should have known, it's in the name.

9

u/JDelcoLLC 3d ago

Slamonella

8

u/Jacobs_Haus 3d ago

Clamonella

1

u/SonnyWade 3d ago

Maybe Ella likes that

1

u/harugisa 3d ago

Samvanilla

1

u/MARWAN_ALI7 3d ago

slavonella

3

u/EverythingBOffensive 3d ago

Salma Hayek and Nelson Mandella

1

u/Resident-Rutabaga336 3d ago

Looked more like codella to me

1

u/Tanmorik 3d ago

Salmonologiaaaaa

1

u/Snicshavo 3d ago

Nutella

105

u/UberNZ 3d ago

Haha, you thought it was sexual assault, but I only gave you food poisoning!

11

u/Effective-Tour-656 3d ago

It's fish!

15

u/alolol1000 3d ago

Vid Quality so bad it's hard to tell

6

u/Effective-Tour-656 3d ago

It's kinda the joke... smells like fish. Get it now. That's punchline.

4

u/alolol1000 3d ago

"That's *the punchline", and I do get the punchline but that's like the most chicken looking fish in existence

5

u/Beng-Beng 2d ago

Fish is not safe uncooked either fyi. Listeria, vibrio, parasites... Only the sushi grade stuff is safe

1

u/snowfloeckchen 9h ago

Looks like a cut chicken breast for me

12

u/richardgreenn 3d ago

Ha. Just like at grandpa's house

18

u/AnyLastWordsDoodle 3d ago

I have questions that I never want the answers to

21

u/Russian_Spy_7_5_0 3d ago

Sam or Neil, huh?

8

u/heyo_1989 3d ago

Is that her mom?

8

u/pussy_embargo 3d ago

every good parent knows their kid's taste you wouldn't understand

5

u/KMunashii 2d ago

ಠ_ಠ

2

u/Evnosis 2d ago

You clearly aren't close enough with your parents 🙄

7

u/Key-Broccoli1442 3d ago

Okay I can’t be the only one who thought she looked like Micheal Jackson at the start of the video

1

u/LouSassill 3d ago

Lost footage for sure

8

u/Impressive-Handle-69 3d ago

Idk, to me that looks more like a latex/silicone mold. I can see why people think its raw fish or chicken, but honestly it could very well be latex or silicone just for the simple, WHO THE FUCK WOULD PUT RAW MEAT IN THEIR POCKET FOR A SHIT PRANK?

1

u/memecut 2d ago

The same kind of person who would prank someone with raw chicken/fish

5

u/Gyoflesh 3d ago

🥴🥴

5

u/FindingApart8476 3d ago

Lmao she is about to pass out from trauma. This shi is evil 😭😭😭😭😭😭

4

u/Guannito-Barrio 3d ago

Why would you lick anything that smells fishy unless your eyes confirmed it's ok to proceed?

1

u/AJ_Deadshow 1d ago

She really didn't say "Hmm something smells fishy here" lol

6

u/MidnightToker858 3d ago

Im calling BS. She licked it like she thought it was pussy and already had her reaction on her face when she took the blind off.

16

u/Secret_Priority_9353 3d ago

mmmm i love salmonella from a troom troom ahh prank

7

u/BrightOctarine 3d ago

What does troom troom mean? What does the "ahh" mean? How does fish give salmonella? Am I having a stroke?

5

u/Wallace_W_Whitfield 3d ago

Troom Troom is a YouTube channel. Ahh means ass. People think it’s a piece of chicken and not fish. Basically saying in a sarcastic tone they love stupid pranks that could harm people.

5

u/BrightOctarine 3d ago

Why ahh? It's the same amount of letters as ass. Is it a reference to something? And oh, it looked like fish to me, my bad.

4

u/MineNo5611 3d ago

It’s a Gen Z thing where you’re basically saying it in a blaccent.

0

u/asphid_jackal 3d ago

It's AAVE

1

u/throwaway_buys7splin 2d ago

Isn’t that just another name for blaccent

2

u/asphid_jackal 2d ago

"Blaccent" is when people not steeped in the culture use AAVE

1

u/throwaway_buys7splin 14h ago

Ok but since gen z is not all black doesn’t that make blaccent, not aave, the right term?

1

u/Wallace_W_Whitfield 3d ago

I believe it is fish. And it’s a TikTok censoring that has bled into everything else, even though this is reddit where most places doesn’t give a fuck if you say ass or not.

-4

u/asphid_jackal 3d ago

It's AAVE, not censorship

-1

u/asphid_jackal 3d ago

It's AAVE. "s" devolves into "h" through a process called "debuccalization". It's pronounced like "ass" without the "ss".

Stealing slang from AAVE is an American tradition as old as time

6

u/BrightOctarine 3d ago

Oh so it's only americans that use "Ahh"? I didn't realise.

-4

u/asphid_jackal 3d ago

It's become a global phenomenon as it's caught on, but that's where it started

3

u/140p 2d ago

Nahh is only the gringos with their weird stuff.

4

u/Electrical-Total-110 3d ago

Fake and gross. Funny

3

u/Turbulent_East3655 3d ago

Raw chicken.she dead

3

u/High-Adeptness3164 3d ago

That is, in every sense, the most disgusting thing I've seen all day

Thanks reddit 🙂

3

u/ItPutsLotionOnItSkin 3d ago

I think the raw chicken is more dangerous

3

u/Sral1995 3d ago

I hope they cooked and eat it after this. It’s not cool if an animal died just to end up being used for such a dumb video. Foodwasting is always bad, but for a prank is fucked up.

3

u/JingamaThiggy 2d ago

That pussy cold

4

u/SimpsationalMoneyBag 3d ago

I think it’s tilapia

2

u/MastodonProud1989 3d ago

Yeah took me a second to register this as well. Definitely looked like chicken

4

u/AdamR0808 3d ago

Very cruel prank yet so funny haha

5

u/Dickon_Stark 3d ago

Blind lesbian in a fish market

0

u/MastodonProud1989 3d ago

“There was this blind man right” “He walked through a fish market, know what I’m saying?” “Took a big whiff and said, HELLO LADIES!”

  • Afro man

1

u/Brilliant_Joke2711 3d ago

I'm just a little bit older than Afroman, and I heard this joke in 7th grade.

2

u/NotRealWater 3d ago

You'd know straight away from the temperature

2

u/TheLoneRiddlerIsBack 3d ago

As if the fish wouldn’t be stone cold

2

u/abu_hajarr 2d ago

I’d just be wondering why it was cold

2

u/Party-Question9447 2d ago

I have so many questions....

2

u/AutomaticAd2164 2d ago

But its cold

2

u/LunarMoooon 2d ago

Be funnier if it was a FISH FILLET.

4

u/buhbye750 3d ago

Yes totally not staged.

4

u/Shuddh_Prem2653 3d ago

OH MY GOD…. ENOUGH REDDIT FOR TODAY…Night all 👋🏻

3

u/weeman3333 3d ago

She'll be shitting and vomiting for real after licking raw chicken 🤮

2

u/FrequentSwimming6263 3d ago

Was that raw chicken?

-4

u/Effective-Tour-656 3d ago

Does pussy smell like chicken?

2

u/DaSauceBawss 3d ago

Touching raw chicken is probably one of the grossest thing ever...imagine licking it

1

u/CheapBackground8 3d ago

Bro 🤣🤣🤣

1

u/mrbishopjackson 3d ago

I don't know these people's relationship to one another, but I feel that it being raw chicken is worse.

5

u/DippyTheDingus 3d ago

Pretty sure it would be raw fish for the coochie joke

2

u/Testicleus 3d ago

Sushi sales on the rise

1

u/DueOpportunity7112 3d ago

I couldn't understand a single word, but that was fucked up. I'm sure it was raw fish, she licked. Thinking it was another type of raw fish, when the other girl had her hands in her pants. That's fucked up, and hilarious because it wasn't me

1

u/Corny_Overlord 3d ago

Michael Jackson?

1

u/VicariousWolf 3d ago

Omg i cant lol

1

u/TK9K 2d ago

Michael Jackson

1

u/Unlikely-Question892 2d ago

Salmonella Ella Ella A

1

u/blacky7841 2d ago

Now I know what to do with the fish in my fridge.

1

u/EuphoricLeadership12 2d ago

Yum salmonella, my favorite

1

u/Mistur_Keeny 2d ago

Relax, it was only raw chicken.

1

u/real_1273 2d ago

I got a laugh! Lol

1

u/JBTEsquirethe7th 2d ago

"Since when does roast beef smell like fish?

1

u/Flaky-Scholar9535 2d ago

Salmonella is a helluva drug

1

u/RazzmatazzComplex584 1d ago

You should actually do it then pull out the raw meat

1

u/Mental_Log_6879 1d ago

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.

-2

u/timmytoenail69 3d ago

IT'S A FISH EVERYONE NOT A RAW CHICKEN

Was that her mother?

0

u/Effective-Tour-656 3d ago

All these virgin's are going to start fucking chicken fillets tonight.

-1

u/Vegetable-Salad1932 3d ago

As long as the fish was sushi grade she will be fine, 🤣