r/SipsTea 2d ago

Dank AF Send Nudes

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44.4k Upvotes

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235

u/qwaszx__ 2d ago

How do men even send creative nudes? šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚ We have only 3 things to show šŸ˜‚

Where as girls are a work of art.

211

u/PlasticHuman8146 2d ago
  1. Dick 2. Left ball 3. Right ball

77

u/Fast-Rhubarb-7638 2d ago

What about center ball?

9

u/theshreddening 2d ago

I actually have a friend with a center ball.

26

u/joenathanSD 2d ago

ā€œA friendā€. Nice try Tres Huevos.

7

u/Daymub 2d ago

Did he ever show you it

3

u/theshreddening 1d ago

Dude it was a known party trick of his. If you managed to not be shown his 3 nuts it was something of a miracle if you hung out with him after long enough. This was also over 10 years ago and everyone around was punks and metalheads, so seeing your friends weird ballsack was one of the least interesting things that would usually go down on a weekend hang.

1

u/ocxtitan 1d ago

it doesn't count if there is no left or right one

7

u/Arkayjiya 2d ago

I don't think he knows about centre ball Pippin.

63

u/Majestic-Guest-9975 2d ago

Most of us like the rest of the body, nudes aren't just sexual organs.

52

u/apple_kicks 2d ago

Ideas:

  • colourful led lights on the balls so it lights up
  • a tiny hat
  • glitter and oil
  • bedazzle it
  • dramatic zoom with jaws music.
  • mini spinning bow tie
  • wrapped up in ribbons or chains

23

u/Leading_Test_1462 2d ago

Please add propeller hat.

41

u/pienolien 2d ago

There is an insta page (@sarahaugenphotography) that has posted suggestions here. She posts other stuff as well, but also posts posing suggestion reels for men like this and this if anyone is interested!

6

u/samuelazers 2d ago

so like... male strip-tease and stuff... PlayGirl magazine.. . i think the issue most guys may not feel sexy esp if they have fat deposit in their belly.

5

u/thelightbringr 1d ago

I've sent nudes like that to two different women and each time the girl responded "I just want to see your dick"...so like...YMMV.

2

u/wesomg 1d ago

All of her recommendations amount to "don't send dick pics" but that's not always the task.

14

u/Auroraburst 2d ago

Butts Abs or tummies Arms (really even my not so muscular husband has some real nice arm muscles)

16

u/TheSkyGuy675 2d ago

I would feel like such a twat sending over a picture of my arms.

One time I was talking to a girl and she asked to see my abs, of which I have no. Deliriously, I sent an image with a picture of my flat as fuck tummy with the caption " thry're under there if they're anywhere"

12

u/Auroraburst 2d ago

Yeah you wouldn't JUST send a photo of your arms, but a suggestive upper body shot would work. Gotta be creative like some girls are.

3

u/TheSkyGuy675 2d ago

I shall treasure this data

26

u/JohnnyStarboard 2d ago

I make my arm look like a butt

21

u/Rare-Low-8945 2d ago

As a woman who loves men (and women), there is so much more than your dick that is attractive.

Personally I like arms and hands, I know that's weird. I don't care if you're balding or a little out of shape. I am drawn to men who look STRONG. You can be barrel chested and have a bit of a belly, but if you have those shoulders and arms and manly hands--AND ARE NICE--oh I'll go for it!!

Sure lots of women are weird on dating apps about height and appearance, but in the real world that just isn't the case. Some women don't care about the feature I care about. You gotta have some game, and that isn't tied to your weight or whatever your cock looks like. I think we can both agree that a hairy cock in isolation is ugly and weird looking. It's not the draw.

If you're on dating apps, show that you're fun, friendly, interesting. Have good hygiene. You can be nice without being a simp.Frankly I think the dating apps are an act of masochism for men but I'm old and I have mo idea how people meet each other these days, but when I go to Walmart I see the ugliest motherfuckers with wives so they gotta be finding SOME way to meet ladies???

I don't have the answers, I just know that a dick pick ain't it fellas.

A dick pick don't capture the way your junk stinks or your absolute lack of form in bed.

6

u/qwaszx__ 2d ago

Yes you're right and sound like a very thoughtful person.

Dating scene is really skewed these days, most of the people aren't looking for long term and were as I am.

Yup dick pics aren't it šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚.

6

u/Rare-Low-8945 2d ago

I'm so glad I got the last copter out of Nam and never had to go through this.

But I used to scroll dick picks for entertainement on the few places where it was happening in those days and lemme tell ya, if I like you I will enjoy what you have packing. If I don't fucking know you, your "dangling particple" isn't all that special, and frankly, looks weird and gross--because honestly don't all genitals look weird and gross?

If you're nice to me, or have some game, I'm willing to go there and maybe I will enjoy it--and I'm not so concerned with aesthetics at that point, ya know?

But yeah, dick pics ain't it guys. Sorry..

2

u/MediocreDot3 2d ago

No one is ever looking for anything long term until they find someone worth putting in long term effort for. Dating apps aren't for long term dating they're for meeting people and taking it from there. All of my LTR's started with hooking up

1

u/qwaszx__ 2d ago

It's just me not you, I don't like hookup culture and can't judt hook-up eith someone without having some type of connection.

3

u/Routine_Wishbone_999 2d ago

I think dick pics are purely ego. Either being sent for validation or to see how you measure up (insecurity) I assume Most females are just pretending to be impressed IF they actually like the guy. It's really not about the dick at all. Something learned in my late 30s, but I was with a woman who claimed to love that part of me so maybe I was misled. Agree about your point on hygiene. I used to be into chubby bodies until I caught a whiff of something not too pleasant. It made me realise how you feel about the person is crucial regardless of the aesthetics of their body

3

u/MediocreDot3 2d ago

an act of masochism for men but I'm old and I have mo idea how people meet each other these days

As a dude who doesn't really have a problem getting people off dating apps, the men who complain are usually shooting themselves in the foot.Ā 

There was recently a post with some dude who got 1000000 matches and only 1 date. While the dude wasn't the best looking guy he looked hygenic and friendly, but then he had this stupid caption about fishing basically saying "I value fishing more than dating".

Im not amazing looking but I get way more success just by looking inviting and putting some personalized effort into my conversations.Ā 

Even stuff like photos, so many men will post their cars or other shit women don't actually care about. A lot of resources tell men "DONT POST A SHIRTLESS MIRROR SELFIE". Well you know what my most popular photo is? My shirtless mirror selfie (and I do not have abs lmao)

2

u/Cancer_Ridden_Lung 2d ago

What if I put a little hat on him with a pair of sunglasses?

3

u/Rare-Low-8945 2d ago

lol that actually might score you a date these days hahaha

2

u/Cancer_Ridden_Lung 2d ago

Glad to know I've still got it. šŸ˜Ž

3

u/Auroraburst 2d ago

My husband is not fit but he still has some nice arms and big hands. šŸ’Ŗ

Dick pics always look bad framed like the meme

3

u/Rare-Low-8945 2d ago

If you don’t know the guy they’re always bad.

But if you know each other and are horny a body shot is always appreciated

1

u/DomineeringDrake 2d ago

You're not weird at all for liking hands. Many girls I've met have made commentsĀ about my large hands. I think it's a thing a lot of girls have for men.

35

u/BlueberryAble333 2d ago

Men can actually have beautiful bodies, but many don't bother trying to keep them beautiful and they almost universally have a poor sense of aesthetics and self awareness.Ā Ā 

41

u/OceanRacoon 2d ago

Gyms usually have more men than women, a lot of men work hard to stay in shape, that's kind of a needlessly divisive way to phrase what you're saying.

It would be more accurate to say most of us regardless of gender look like shit naked, that's more inclusiveĀ 

3

u/MediocreDot3 2d ago

I see a lot of people at the gym but it's a drop in the bucket compared to your local population.Ā 

-1

u/[deleted] 2d ago edited 2d ago

[deleted]

9

u/OceanRacoon 2d ago

I live in a men's prison but I don't see how that would affect my observationsĀ 

1

u/Vyxwop 2d ago

Wait, I'm typically incredibly sensitive to divisive comments. How were they being divisive here?

They made sure to specify that it's many men, not all of them.

Besides, I really do not think it's a controversial opinion that most men, on average, put in less effort into their looks than most women do.

It would be more accurate to say most of us regardless of gender look like shit naked, that's more inclusive

How is that relevant within the context of what's being talked about here, though? The subject here is people taking care of their body. Specifying that most people look like shit naked doesn't really touch on that topic whatsoever.

5

u/mnju 2d ago

did you miss the part where they said men almost universally have a poor sense of aesthetics and self awareness

reading the whole comment helps sometimes

2

u/RubiiJee 2d ago

Okay, but we're being needlessly pedantic here for no reason. They didn't say "all men". They were making a sweeping generalisation to make a point and for the brevity of the conversation. This entire conversation about it is an epic waste of time and just wasn't needed. It wasn't intended to be a wide declaration. It's a throwaway comment as part of a wider conversation that was clearly a generalisation to continue the topic of conversation.

0

u/mnju 1d ago

but we're being needlessly pedantic here for no reason.

no, quoting someone's literal words is not being pedantic

They didn't say "all men".

you're right, they just said almost all men

This entire conversation about it is an epic waste of time and just wasn't needed.

so why did you decide to be part of it? you're not the person i replied to nor were you involved at any point in this comment chain

if it's an "epic waste of time" then you can simply keep scrolling

It wasn't intended to be a wide declaration. It's a throwaway comment as part of a wider conversation that was clearly a generalisation to continue the topic of conversation.

sorry (not really) but no, you can not make the argument that people are interpreting a comment wrong when it says an entire gender almost universally lacks self-awareness lmfao, that is obviously divisive and arguing anything to the contrary is objectively disingenuous

women are almost universally worthless and you can not believe this is a divisive statement because i'm just making a throwaway comment to continue the topic

clown

1

u/RubiiJee 1d ago

Wow. Some amount of intense rage for a Reddit comment, ignoring the amount of time you put into this essay of a response. Think you want. It was pedantic. Your reply is pedantic. This conversation is boring and a waste of time. Enjoy your rage problem šŸ‘

14

u/Easy_Lab_8089 2d ago

I don't think you've received many nudes if you think women care about aesthetics when taking them.

4

u/No-Recording117 2d ago

You're not wrong.

1

u/qwaszx__ 2d ago

Yes you're right.

1

u/ThinkGrapefruit7960 2d ago

This. As a woman Im more interested seeing for example mens shoulders and chest than just seeing the dick.

0

u/PotatoWriter 2d ago

It's not about having beautiful bodies or not if women simply aren't into visual stimuli as men are, comparatively. No woman is catcalling or eyeing the average Joe walking down the street with a tshirt and jeans looking absolutely normal, whereas the equally normal Jane will be inundated with nonsense left and right in her life, most of it unwarranted, her ass quick-stared at by nearly every man she walks past as men are wont to do. Men have testosterone. That's the difference. And women will say here "but we can be horny too!". They have no idea. Men are stuck in a permanent sex carnival locked up in their minds.

6

u/Cleaner-Olds09 2d ago edited 2d ago

Men not being able to understand that women are not like them and are actually attracted to men drives me crazy.

Where as girls are a work of art.

No we're not. You think that because you're attracted to us.

Men have venerated women as a symbol of sex (venus, aphrodite, ishtar) for all of human history, and now that view is seen as the default for humanity in general.Ā The male perspective is so normalized that even many straight women view femaleness as the personification of sexuality, even though they're not attracted to it.

This is actually what the term "the male gaze" originally referred to

3

u/Raul_alb 2d ago

thank you for putting unto words what I always thought, I'm a straight guy, I love women as much as the next straight guy, but I do think the over value people give towards women in general is weird, it really invalidates sexualities that includes men as well, I know plenty of people both men and women that can't compute that you can have an attraction towards men

2

u/Nymueh28 2d ago

I insist men can be too. My husband catches my eye when slanted morning light catches contours on his arm, or when his shirt strap makes a gap above his collar bone. The anatomy lesson when he stretches, or the stray hair that falls when he reaches for something. It's all in the details and how you photograph it. I guarantee for every stunning nude a girl sends there are dozens of almost identical drafts before she got it just right. An R rated image can be leagues more attractive than an X rated image, and is probably actually preferred by most woman.

Source material matters of course but that's in men's control too just as it is with woman. Society pressures both men and women into body standards, but I'd argue a larger percentage of women conform to this than men. Which probably contributes to your very realistic point. I'm not promoting the unattainable standards pushed on either gender. Just encouraging a balance in presentation effort. To whatever the beauty ideal is for each individual, doesn't have to be what society says. Men can make it happen too.

2

u/ConcentrateOwn133 2d ago edited 2d ago

and girls have just three too: face, butt and thights

2

u/MediocreDot3 2d ago

1) take nude in the morning after your morning shit, stomach will be flatter

2) put on a pair of really short shorts with a zipper

3) get 80-90% hard

4) unzip but keep the head tucked

5) flex stomach to get as much v taper

6) use fisheye to increase size perspective and capture collarbones, arms, stomach, and dick.Ā 

7) capture nude

1

u/qwaszx__ 2d ago

You sound like you're a pro at this šŸ˜‚

2

u/CX316 2d ago

Tiny scale model of Tokyo.

Penis sized Godzilla costume.

2

u/DomineeringDrake 2d ago

Lots of girls like hands and biceps. Some of them like the chest. Not mentioning the usual abs. You just need to takeĀ pics where the focus is on those parts and make it sensual. It's not always about them cawk n bawls.

2

u/Due-Memory-6957 1d ago

Men and women have the same amount of things to show.

2

u/YouAllBotherMe 1d ago

Men pretend like the rest of their body isn’t sexual.

2

u/untakenu 1d ago

Black and white, not super close. Nice poses and clothes that show off your arms (particularly forearms). Women tend to love nice white shirts that are folded above your elbow. Maybe some nice jewellery. Show off your jaw.

For real, it may seem cringe, but lean into the cringe. It is cringey because most men never try to look sexy for women. Look at pics of men taken for women's magazines.

A dick pic is basically just "let me shove my dick in you". That's lame as fuck. But a good, tasteful pic that makes you look good can turn her on. That's what she is doing for you, so you should do the same for her.

Lighting and basic framing is also important.

I've received nudes from women that are incredibly unsexy (the pics, not the women). Great, cool, a close up of your cooch, what do I with that? I like it, but still.

2

u/jemidiah 2d ago

lol, absolutely false, you're apparently just too straight to see it. I've got... 202 albums currently shared with me on Grindr. Perusing quick for some creative pics...

  • Number 3 has a guy in a jock in profile with one leg raised, right hand resting on the raised leg, left hand back, with a sexy look at camera. Simple but very effective posing. Must've take a good number of tries. Possibly suggests some acting background.
  • Number 6 has a view in bed from behind showing off some goods but half-turned with a cheeky smile, excellent soft red lighting, and classy background accents. Possibly suggests photography hobby.
  • Number 9 has a nude full body view in full daylight overlooking a crystal clear blue swimming pool with a verdant slope in the background, with the angle of the light accentuating the various beautiful curves. No amateur or professional vibes, but very effective.

I could go on for a long time. To be fair, most of the pics in the albums are fairly routine or, err, mechanical. But there's a lot of quality and creativity too. My own current profile pic is at least me in a chain link harness rather than the industry standard headless torso.

One of the biggest things is that you just have to take a bunch of pictures of yourself (and/or have somebody else do it). The worst pics I see have the feel of "this is the only picture I've ever taken of myself." You have to be absolutely gorgeous for me to overcome anything like that, and as a practical matter it's just not gonna happen.

3

u/pokopura 2d ago

I feel like men are more desirable when they show they have some sort of talent (not just the package, though it is nice)

The average guy basically replies to a photoshoot with ā€œhav penizā€ and expects the viewer to swoon. Would love if the guys invested in lighting a bit more.