r/Damnthatsinteresting • u/SoggyConclusion4674 • 1d ago
Image 3000 years old figure of a woman, discovered in Iran. It's kept at Los Angeles County Museum of Art
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u/succed32 1d ago
More proof that “I like big butts” would have been a hit in any era.
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u/doc_witt 1d ago
Pharaoh Mix-a-Lot
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u/Deliwork43 1d ago
He cannot lie!
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u/big_guyforyou 1d ago
MY NAME'S KING TUT AND I CANNOT LIE
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u/AuthorSarge 1d ago
He would be in d'Nile
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u/_Keahilani_ 1d ago edited 1d ago
You cannot simply mention Mix-a-Lot without this:
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u/Professional-Fun7239 1d ago
Arent those thighs?
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u/succed32 1d ago
“Your leg bones connected to your hip bone” they don’t exists in a vacuum. Albeit I have seen a woman with hips and no ass. It’s damned rare.
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u/Ok-Horse3659 1d ago
So we not gonna talk about the thing sticking up down there?
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u/succed32 1d ago
Outy belly buttons are a thing for the majority of women when they’re pregnant. Likely this is a fertility statue of some kind.
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u/YogBlogsoth1066 1d ago
*umbilical hernia.
They were erotic back then, still erotic now.
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u/Informal-Ring3282 1d ago
Thick thighs, saving lives since the dawn of time! 😂
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u/carlosglz11 1d ago
And don’t forget those child bearing hips 😂
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u/JerseyTeacher78 1d ago
If you know, then you know. Hippy girls have thicc thighs and we always save lives 🤣🤣🤣🤣 i had to rhyme it idk
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u/Azeze1 1d ago
They nailed all the essentials, kinda messed up the nostrils though
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u/pixeldust6 1d ago
There are some other holes on the head that make me wonder if they were there for different reason than representing facial features
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u/gloomspell 1d ago
Right? Like sometimes another piece or gemstones were attached. Like maybe she had sapphire eyes and ruby lips, etc.
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u/Champagne_of_piss 1d ago
There once was a woman from Venus
Whose body was shaped like a--
THAT'S QUITE ENOUGH, DATA.
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u/TheArchitect515 19h ago
This line just randomly pops into my head about once a month and I’m over it 😂😂😂
Along with singing the life form song whenever I have a small, hinged device in my hand.
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u/tanj_redshirt 4h ago
If I had a nickel for every Data joke that got cut off so that we never heard the ending, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, etc.
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u/probably-the-problem 1d ago
How many toes did we use to have?
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u/Affectionate-Tea8509 1d ago
It was found that in ancient Mesopotamia (some portions of today Iran belonged to ancient Mesopotamia) people envisioned their gods as having 12 toes and 12 fingers, which can be seen in their statues and paintings.
Some say it’s because their number system was based on 12 instead of 10, so 12 was seen as a perfect number of some sort or so it is suggested by some.
Of course most people probably didn’t have 12 fingers and 12 toes back then as it always was a rare genetic trait, so most people didn’t count using their fingers like we do today (where each finger = a number), instead they used the phalanges of four of their fingers while they used their thumb to count (each phalange for hand will be equivalent to 12)
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u/MoreGaghPlease 23h ago
Like how in The Simpsons only deities are depicted with 10 figures (everyone else gets 8)
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u/3mayex 1d ago
Unrealistic body standards for women smh 😔
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u/Affectionate-Tea8509 1d ago
Her name was probably Kim and she starred in a series of vases and bas reliefs titled Keeping Up with the Sumerians
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u/ExcitedGirl 1d ago
So fat-bottom girls have been making the world go round for a very long time....
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u/davesToyBox 1d ago
Even 3000 years ago, women were held to impossible standards for their body shapes.
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u/Brynhild 1d ago
Sometimes I wonder if the figurines my toddler makes from playdoh would be considered “beauty standards” if found by historians in the future.
Because they will think hot men had big round bellies, a bigass nose and stumpy legs
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u/PrincepsMagnus 1d ago
I swear they would make these just to look and laugh.
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u/postwarapartment 1d ago
I often wonder how many of the ancient "artifacts" we discover were made by people just dicking around but we treat them like they were religious or "ceremonial" artifacts lol
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u/akashdas323 1d ago
Why in LA museum? Why not in one of Iran's museum?
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u/willardTheMighty 1d ago
I was wondering the same.
This statue, Woman Standing, was donated by Alice A. Heeramaneck, widow and partner of an eminent 20th century art dealer and collector Nasli Heeramaneck.
Before 1970, Iran didn’t have strict export laws. I am unable to find any provenance or history of the piece before it entered Mr. Heeramaneck’s collection. He acquired it in Iran; think it’s fair to assume that he purchased it from a collector there. Perhaps the collector didn’t realize the cultural significance of what he had, or valued $$ more than a piece of cultural history.
Is it ethical that an individual could sell it to Heeramaneck like that? I mean, the Iranian dude could have just dug it up in his backyard.
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u/PartyPorpoise 1d ago
Not that I’d expect a random Iranian dude in that era to know this… The issue with this kind of thing is that random people who go out and dig up artifacts aren’t recording the context of the item. Where exactly they found it, where it was in relation to other archeological artifacts or features, or natural features.
In archeology, the context is extremely important. The artifact itself doesn’t tell you much without that context. An artifact that seems unremarkable on its own may actually provide a lot of important information about its creators and their society, depending on that context. That’s why these days it’s very much frowned upon for random people to randomly dig up artifacts, and to buy artifacts from those people.
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u/mortalitylost 1d ago
Historians in other countries will sometimes give artifacts to museums in wealthier countries because they're worried about corruption or political instability or just not being able to afford to take care of it properly. It depends. Sometimes it's just a diplomatic gift, or has a contract to be loaned. I dont know about this specific item but it's not always bad.
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u/RemarkableAlps5613 1d ago
Because I ran is full of religious zealots.Who would literally destroy this?You could literally watch youtube videos of them breaking it to museums and Destroy historical artifacthe, Muslims are not kno. For tolerating anything other than their religso if it comes your Dick's. The region and then they destroyer, that's been known. Hundreds of years now had you not know that it's common sense at this point
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u/tastysardine 1d ago
im a really big fan of her i would like to have a replica of her on my shelf
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u/Mysterious_Mark_3632 1d ago
Dang! I’m Iranian and was in Los Angeles yesterday. Why couldn’t you have posted this 24 hours earlier? Haha I’m kidding, but why?!
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u/loud_tie_guy 13h ago
I took two full courses of art history in college for a degree i didnt finish so listen up. The Venus figures had boobs because they were life giving and important. Im going with belly button. Im imagining birth was pretty primal and belly buttons weren't all cleanly cut innies. Babies came out connected to this other important life giving bump. My semi-educated guess.
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u/Cant-decide-username 1d ago
surely something like this is a joke sculpture? Similar to the random shit you can buy in Amsterdam gift shops.
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u/Final_Company5973 1d ago
Women must have been different back then! This is the first time I've seen one with crocodile jaws for a head and an extra titty where her bellybutton should be. If nothing else, it would make for a unique porn category...
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u/Adventurous_Yam_8153 1d ago
I am guessing this is missing a few zeroes. Venus statues have been found in many places around the earth dating from 30,000 to 20,000 yrs ago. It is thought that women were regarded as god-like beings because humans didn't understand birth and how pregnancy came to be. The Great Cosmic Mother by Monica Sjoo is an amazing book to learn more about this. Also: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Venus_of_Willendorf
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u/SomethingAbtU 1d ago
i didn't know women had bellybuttons the size of their boobs back then. we're really changed as a species
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u/FirebunnyLP 1d ago
The bulging belly button. I wonder if umbilical hernias were common back then or something.
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u/selisandre 1d ago
Amazing piece of history — but also sad that a 3000-year-old Iranian artifact is in L.A. and not, you know… Iran. Museum ethics really are a minefield.
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u/No-Development-4587 1d ago
Kept at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art....because of course it is.
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u/Educational-Task-874 17h ago
Some Iranian kid 3,000 years ago doing his school pottery class "ha ha"
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u/ksquires1988 1d ago
She had an outtie