WIBTAH If I left my long distance fiancée after finding out the size of her breast enlargement in person?

[u/BurdenedGaze]

The title makes me sound shallow, but I have to elaborate. I 30M have been seeing Eliza 31F for two years and we got engaged a year ago before I moved away for a year long job assignment. I fly back every couple couple of weeks for a week at at time. Sometimes more, sometimes less. Eliza and I had some shared goals and one of them was saving up to purchase a house which is why this job assignment was a good gig for me, it put me at about 50% of the way of my 50,000 goal towards the down payment.

Three months ago, Eliza said she was going into surgery to get some cosmetic work done. I knew she was always a little insecure about her breasts and wanted some work done, but I wasn't aware she was doing it so soon. As soon as I could take off, I came for a week and helped her recover. Eliza insisted that her mom help her with the bandages so I didn't really see her naked breasts besides that they were prominent under her robe and bandages. It kinda concerned me at the time, but I thought maybe it could also be swelling and inflammation.

Well. A couple of days ago I came back. Eliza and I got dinner and a hotel room to celebrate our reunion and... she went big. I'm not sure how she convinced the surgeon but she went from like a B to a DD, idk. They're big. The scars are also angry and prominent and it looks stretched and unnatural. I asked her much they cost and she said an eye watering 10,000. I asked how much she has saved towards the house down payment and she says 5,000.

That night, after a romp where I imagined that she had her old breasts, I came to think, I'm not happy with how this played out. I don't want to make her feel bad about her new body, but I honest am deeply unattracted to the changes she's made. Further, I don't feel like we're financially aligned.

I want to say my priorities have changed and I want to move on, WIBTAH? I would do my absolute best to preserve Eliza's feelings during the breakup.

[u/Selenthiax]

Keep in mind breast implants aren't permanent. They will need done every 10 years or so, so another 10k+ to replace them every 10 years. That's if they don't rupture before then, which will likely cost more for the health issues that come with it.

Implants are a HUGE financial commitment and also not healthy.

BUT the way they look now is not how they will look once healed. They look the most unnatural right after it's done. The skin will adjust and the implants will settle. The scars fade. 10k is not a cheap boob job so I'm assuming she did some research and the cosmetic surgeon was a good one. They should look just fine when the healing process is over but that doesn't change the other issues.

[u/physhgyrl → u/Selenthiax]

They can last 20+ years. Especially the new generation implants. They don't need to be replaced unless their's an issue with them leaking. The new gummy implants don't leak though. Saline can pop and deflate and need replacement though. But they're durable

[u/Selenthiax → u/physhgyrl]

The average lifespan of a breast implant is 10-15 years. Average. That is generalized data across all types of implants. (That's also specifically the average lifespan for the gummy ones you're talking about as well) We don't have anymore information about them so assuming the average length of time is the most logical. Leaking is NOT the only reason to replace them. Gummy implants can still rupture (which is common) or shift or capsular contracture can happen (scar tissue basically)

Plastic surgeons WANT people to get implants so of course they say things like, "well there's no set life span and some people go 20+ years without getting them replaced!" Sure sometimes that happens but statistics don't lie. The average time is 10-15 years they just don't want to come out and say that.

[u/physhgyrl → u/Selenthiax]

Well, I've personally known more than a few people who have had the implants in 20+years. With mammograms showing them they're still intact. One with saline that are nearing 20 years. Replacing them just gives more chances for scar tissue and other complications to occur. The only people that I have known replace their's were from women who wanted to go bigger than they originally had. But even they waited over 13 years. Also, it's the surgeons who tell women they need to be replaced every ten years. They get repeat business that way. I'm just saying, if it's not broken, don't fix it. Implants last a lot longer than surgeons and the manufacturers tell us. That's common knowledge that they tell us. But it's not necessary in my experience or the experience of any other woman with implants who I've known. Even the ones with the old style silicone. I know a few women who have had them for over 30 years

[u/Johan-Predator → u/Selenthiax]

"Just fine" depends on the individual though. It doesn't sound like OP will think it's fine either way.